Treat your emotions like a choose-your-ending story!

Remember when you were a kid, and there were 3 types of books in the school library that were always popular?  The Baby Sitter's Club, Goosebumps, and.....those wonderful books where you got to make choices to determine the outcome of the story.  You could read them several times each, making different choices along the way, and experience the story in a new way each time.  The choices made along the way were relatively simple, but they could make a big difference in the plot of the stories.

As I think about it, life's emotional roller coaster is actually a lot like those choose-your-ending books.  With each event in your life, you make choices about how to deal with the situation.  For example:



An old lady has just plowed her car into yours.  You're immediately aware that your car has been totaled, but thankfully you're not injured.  Do you:
A: Yell and scream at the old lady about how old people shouldn't be allowed behind the wheels of a car.
B: Calmly help the old lady out of her car and onto the side of the road, then call 9-1-1.

Your boyfriend of 3 years breaks up with you.  Do you:
A: Become his stalker and vow to get him back...no matter what.
B: Spend the rest of the day on the couch with your cat, crying and eating ice cream and watching horror movies...and then move on.

You discover that you are pregnant, but it was completely unplanned.  You are single, and your child's father will not be around.  Do you:
A: Run out and get an abortion...before it's too late!
B: Spend the rest of the day on the couch with your cat, crying and eating ice cream and watching Gene Kelley musicals...and then start planning for a baby.

Your temporary job comes to an end earlier than expected.  Do you:
A: File for every available government assistance program, pull out your ratty house clothes, and prepare to become a Welfare leech.
B: Start looking for a new job.

See, from time to time, everyone goes through things that just plain suck.  You always have choices about how to act or react.  You can A: become unreasonable, make quick decisions, and end up making things worse, OR you can B: admit that it sucks, deal with it quickly, and then decide how best to move on.  YOU are the only person who has any control over the things you do and the choices you make.  Certainly you can't control everything that happens TO you, but you have absolute control over what you do about it, over how you handle the situation, over how much control you allow your emotions to have over you.  It's normal and healthy to want to make decisions with your heart, but wanting to do a thing and actually doing it are not the same thing.  And actually making all your decisions with your heart alone is not so likely to get you where you want to go in life.  Many times you just have to ignore your heart, at least temporarily, and make clear decisions with your mind.

My ex-husband always used to tell me, and anyone else, that bad things were just "mind over matter.  If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."  At the time, I thought it was such a dumb thing to say.  Yet, while saying it might make you sound like a total douche, there is some real truth behind the phrase.  It's hard not to "mind" when bad things happen.  But you can make sure that "minding" doesn't get in your way while you're working toward your...

Happily Ever After.